Monday, March 14, 2005
michelle branch-goodbye to you
Of all the things I've believed in
I just want to get it over with
Tears form behind my eyes
But I do not cry
Counting the days that pass me by
I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words that I'm hearing are starting to get old
Feels like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend
And I said,
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
I still get lost in your eyes
And it seems that I can't live a day without you
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light
But it's not right
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
Ooh, And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time
I want what's yours and I want what's mine
I want you
But I'm not giving in this time
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
The one thing that I tried to hold on to....
The one thing that I tried to hold on to....
The one thing that I tried to hold on to....
And when the stars fall
I will lie awake
You're my shooting star
when i created this draft, i was really feeling like this song. hahaha. funny huh. oh well right now im just too tired to think. but this song rocks and rules. love the mtv... so beautiful. michelle branch is beautiful, i loved her bohe top, loved her locket necklace, etc. yayyy love her hair. I WANNA PERM MY HAIR. hahah but pple have been telling me not to haha i'll look old they say, but hey 18 yrs of being the kiddyface. time to look like ahma. hahaha. i wanna do sth la. im just sooo bored. with how i look. needa experiment. i've got this thing for red tops lately. haha used to hate bright colours, but hey now now they're not so bad huh.
wells wells.
update of my life: it isnt very interesting.mundane, everyday things, nothing that blew my mind away, nothing that swept me off my feet. yes i can safely put a blank right here and claim this is my life so far. but that would be ripping prettyboy off. cuz he did just that.
went off bikini shopping with shao jiayan xw near our workplace aft work one day. was so stupid... i hate bikinis. haha but yea anyways those bintan buggers each got one nice bikini. and haha i was just too pissed off at that girl in the mirror that i didnt get anything. haha i hate my body yes. think im just gonna get a SUPER nice billabong/roxy bikini top that matches the bodshorts frm the us i have right now... or maybe i should get a full set and wear the bottom in the shorts. haha xw's advice so dumb... oh well. EXERCISE! shall be the exercise guru.
mon was gotham.. a coupla really EMBARASSING things happened to me, one was in front of those i went clubbing with(sorry if im direction blind as well as blind) and another one was in fronta zafri... long time no see become long time no see oof! ok shall not go into details. i'm feeling embarassed just thinking abt it.
sunday was afua meeting... tagged along with lucas, was antisocial with my earplugs... met a coupla pretty nice pple. and yea as usual saboed myself by giving suggestions for publicity. really hope hopejam works. hahaha might volunteer on that day.. but then again i also wanna go for the event with friends. haha see first la. most of my friends would prob not last long or only wanna stay for the eic or electrico one. so yay happy days. but i do think those are the two best bands, even after talking to levan. haha oops. not my type of music. they're good but not the best to me, sorry to all ronin fans out there.
anyways really hoping that the whole nj gig comes true... wong says he's really busy right now and will try his best. hmm. if the vp turns down sth like that then there goes nj's chance at redemption. schools here should really open up. sorta like smu. but then again starting to get the impression smu's not as different as it's made out to be. just slightly different. a forced kind of different. cuz no matter how great the school is, it always depends on the people in it and the culture it's in the middle of.
just thinking, where would i be happier? there must have been a reason why i was so desperate to go overseas last time... i hate regrets. i dont wanna regret. but would i be happy moving from a big city, where im so used to the conveniences the vices the people being the city slicker, over to a big kampung, where i dont know anyone, the tallest building is my sch's clock tower, there are plenty of people with redneck agendas and well the people in my sch would come from the same high school. and then im just gonna be pissed off abt the clique thing again.
wish that one day i could just abandon everyone forget everyone get permanent amnesia and just run away from this place to go find my happy place. no strings attached. nothing pulling me back. the things some people say, it's disgusting, you know who you are, u're such a disgusting bitchy bitch. really, spare me the details, do i look like im interested. do i sound like im interested. screw off dont irritate me. gosh, u so need assurance and i thought i needed assurance. guess i met my match.oh man that was bitchy. but oh well really fedup with this. im really not THAT clueless, you know. damn if i'm interested in media and advertising n marketing, honestly, i cant make it in the us. unless i get REALLY lucky. damn really how does this work, i go overseas, despite wanting to come back in june, i still have summer lessons, summer internships and stuff, so i dont come back for a year. maybe i wont lose certain people but then think abt it this way... thou i really regret it, there was this time when the aussie pple came back and kept wanting to meet up with us, but we're too busy with jc, all the time. we sorta put our jc friends before them. maybe we assume they'd be there too much, and maybe now it's too late. wont uni be way busier, and how will they have time to even give a shit that HEY im back. really dont wanna wind up hating it in two places. then i'd really have no place to go. no happy place, really truly no place i belong to.my bro's description of the girls lives over there is like they stick within the international/singapore girls and esp stick to their bfs. but really, i want to keep my philosophy that one does not build his/her kingdom around their other halves. friends are just as impt if not more important.
just go read that article in life by janice wong... think it cant get any truer.
guess this is just one of those things u have to learn to deal by urself.
oh wells... im just so tired havent been sleeping much or well lately. ooo wells. haha thou today's fri think wont be going out already la.. yay tmr open hse then gonna force buddy to watch another kid's show with me.. robots... and then sunday gonna do driving and go shop... shopping list:jeans, flare skirt, basics, heels.
yay and today gonna go and cut my hair... maybe. actually i think yes. i wanna get those kinda short fringes
uneven ones... two layers... one that's short fringe all the way and one that's layered alll the way down. haha im sick of my boyband fringe. hahaha and my hair is so messy n dry. snip off all the split ends
then gonna perm my hair to be wavy... hahhaha. yay.
oh wells... life's just idiotic like that. as idiotic as me.
I am just an ordinary average everyday sane psycho supergoddess.
She needed someone at 12:12 AM
