Monday, January 03, 2005
tRapT-eCho
Close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste asking why
I'll run away with you by my side
I'll run away with you by my side
(close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by)
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
(asking why)
I think about your face, and how I fall into your eyes
The outline that I trace, around the one that I call mine
A time that called for space, unclear where you drew the line
I don't need to solve this case, and I don't need to look behind
Close my eyes,
let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste asking why (asking why)
I'll run away with you by my side (by my side)
I'll run away with you by my side (I'll run away with you)
(close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by)
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
(asking why)
Do I expect to change the past I hold inside
With all the words I say repeating over in my mind
Some things you can't erase, no matter how hard you try
An exit to escape is all there is left to find
Close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste asking why (asking why)
I'll run away with you by my side (by my side)
I'll run away with you by my side (I'll run away with you)
(close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by)
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo in my mind
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo can subside
So I
Close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by
There is no time to waste asking why
I'll run away with you by my side
I'll run away with you by my side (I'll run away with you)
(close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by)
I need to let go, let go, let go, let go of this pride
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo in my mind
Until this echo, echo, echo, echo can subside
this song is really... nice. haha my vocab is limited...
love the verse "Close my eyes, Let the whole thing pass me by...There is no time to waste asking why...I'll run away with you by my side."
nice huh? kinda describes my obsession with swinging when i feel down... haha or skiing in korea. haha...like u know u're just swinging feeling closed up in ur own little sphere... and the wind's in ur hair... and u're... alone. and it's like u're running away. like an escape. like u close ur eyes and feel the wind pass over ur face. like it's washing away everything.
skiing's even better... like night skiing. haha it was prob the worst time in korea aft uhm... the last day when we stayed at the church. regret it... haha tt's why i really really needed to walk back in the cold(crazy me) and well went whoosing down the slopes for some. esp the one in the middle. love that one... it lasts longer and well i just really let the cold wind pass over my face and well whoosh. haha... felt better. haha. im nuts. haha. but, when u're sometimes stripped of ur senses... just feels good to know u can still feel the wind on ur face. yup. im nuts. again. whatever. back to topic.
hmmm first... happy new year to all.. and thanks so much for coming and for all the prezzies best thing was that u guys turned up really, sorry i was too busy at times yea? haha. im starting to like doing stuff like that. maybe i'll host more of these kinda stuff when im in ut and i actually get an apartment. maybe second yr or sth. yayyy. haha whatever.
and well got a few nice thanks to say...
thanks to melissa for making the konnyaku haha dint get to eat it was too busy but like yea! thanks soo much cuz yea needed some help like cuz u know la...
thanks to becks and mervs for staying...and helping to clear up and all. thanks soo much. and mervs, thanks for the cert of entitlement and ur what lip shit.... hahaha okok it's nice la haha thanks! haha gonna miss bickering with u. and well u owe me an espresso bet. and wells sorry lola and bernard abt my babbling that nearly got u into trouble and shit. sooo sorry. anyways hope u guys go overseas haha go us go us then we can go visiting each other. and to josh and ching... wish u guys cudda come... but thanks for the... sexy things... wahhaa. im so not... that. haha...
and to shingfuh... dun worry abt not being able to come goodness u sounded like u felt so bad... haha sorry sorry.
to mich and mao.. thanks so much for coming early.. thou in the end.. haha ya know. and bell... really, i'll miss u too. lots.
melwyn thanks for driving me out to get the cups and drinks... soooo sorry i had to mah fun u... but dun think u'd be reading this but... oh well... yea... thanks anyways... and thanks for halal pork! im a believer! haha shit im gonna get killed for saying something so sacrilegous.
but im gonna pin that halal pork sign up on my board. haha.
well this time this party was really very different... acc to bernard and lola, it's cuz last time they knew everyone else... so they started going crazy. without the help of alc. wahhaa. but nxt time im gonna follow their advice and mix beer with vodka... then "the person will dance to even twinkle twinkle little stars" hahaha.
damn miss talking cock... esp with old friends. haha quite a few of them dunno how much they mean to me. but yea... just hope that they wont forget my name when i go overseas or sth. might even start hating coming back if i wind up so alone here. hah. think i like the talking face to face thing. wish the world wasnt so advanced... then phone buddies remain phone buddies and not online buddies and etc. it's always nicer to hear a voice, see a face.
wells... i dunno la.. i was so stressed i was really vulgar. haha cuz like i just kept thinking shit it sucks it sucks. whatever la. and pple cudden find their way in. and not enough drinks. and well i bought a pack of ice that dint get used and had to empty it into a drain and throw the packaging into a dustbin of a neighbour's.
and this time dint really get to have that much fun. some may know why. but haha but not the full extent. u know why? cuz i figured out lately aft getting my hopes up, that friendship kinda works in one way... u'll find urself alone when u need someone. wish i had my room to myself now. cuz really need the alone time. maybe they were right tt ive got my priorities wrong. feeling really used.
anyways... was nice that so many pple turned up and yea felt nice that i saw my friends having fun...and thanks for everything, mao, mich, bell, bernard, lola, huiyi... those who were near me helping me with the cake and all... haha it really felt nice to be with so many old friends. means alot. someone's past is what he's made of.
and haha kat!!!! ur shotglasses rocked... hahaha so damn useful haha... everyone was using it and shotting up. haha for the first time in my life i actually downed the whole damn thing instd of last time me and xw... haha gingerly sipping... wahaha it sucked then. haha... oh shit. hahahha.... took two shots... quite nice actually if u dun actually taste the teq. hmms.
hmm surprising la.. quite alota pple got high... and melvyck got drunk. hmm. dunno la.
anyways me, merv, desmond, lola, becks, ash spent the nite talking abt everything. haha... nj politics, and merv and lola got along soo damn well haha same pattern... talk shit abt some pple.... haha shall not mention names. but i din know whether to feel bad for those pple or laugh. cuz they really were funny. talked abt politics and whoa our talks were really kinda... hormonal. guys la... testosterone raging they were talking abt anything and everything sick under the sun. WHOA. haha... shall not go into details. but anyways later desmond fell asleep and was snoring... and like merv started running his hand up and down his thigh to see if he'd wake up if molested then later like mervs and lola took the liquor bottle and started running it up and down his thighs soooo funny. esp their expressions. then it's like me becks and ash cudden stop laughing. then like mervs and lola wanted to get his hp out and put it... somewhere and call it to make it vibrate... wahhaa... to see if he wud wake up... haha... then merv tried to reach into his pocket... but his hp wasnt there. then lola tried frm the other side. and he cudden get it lorx. wahha... and it sooo got bad when they focused their crazyness on me and started calling me boy eater like after samantha in sex and the city. assholes. and they were saying such sick stuff!!! like as in hey man say sick stuff but dun drag me in.
anyhows mervs and lola... amazingly similar.
cept that lola's a jock. and he admits it.
merv was an ass la... he hid my ipod in the black box he gave me for my bday... and like i knew he was up to sth... then later... when they left i cudden find my ipod! was sooooo scared then rem merv and his assholic ways. then found the ipod in there. idiot. then before that... he sent himself a damn sick msg with my phone... ASSHOLE. i did not send that. go die. go drink a million espressos. and die in camp. cuz u'll like be jumping and jumping in ur seat cuz of the caffeine while they shave ur head... and then they'll shave thru ur numbskull and ur brains wud spill out. yayyyyyy. hahaha... shit im so sadistic.
oh and laogong was really sweet... haha babysitting becks and all. haha and at one point in time he practically fed me sprite like i cudden hold the cup myself. haha he was the babysitter of the evening! hahaha. was so damn happy to see him when he arrived haha. then later when i downed two shots and was feeling kinda woozy, then he had left already then i was like... damn where's my laogong!!! haha. sometimes think laogong's bipolar. wahaha. but he was really at his nicest. haha hope that he gets his girl and actually i think he's already gotten her haha yea hope this works out for him. he's gotten nicer over two years. hahaha.. sometimes it's nice stuff that some pple sometimes do that does make me wonder if there are pple who do give a damn who care... give a damn what's going on with me, give a damn if i leave and never come back... it's the nice things pple say the smallest almost unnoticeable things they do and say... that makes me wonder if there are pple who care but i just keep ignoring it and closing myself up or running away. maybe i've focused on the wrong people. ive overestimated my worth in some pple and underestimated my worth in some others.
oh well the party was memorable.. last time seeing quite alota pple. yups. no more sch. starting to miss the regularity of school. and i hate being ard older pple... like way older pple... senior juniors whatever... they're all peers dammit. being older doesnt give u authority over others. doesnt give u the right to deliberately and not jokingly make others feel small.
and i guess the workplace will be like that. and with a shitface like mine, im gonna die and crash and burn in hell.
well tdy went with my bro's abc friend to shop... haha... dressed real school girlish cuz well i cudden be bothered to really dress up so i just wore anything comfy... my comfy jeans were in the wash so wore my denim skirt. and my bro just said i look 14. and wont let go that im kiddy. argh. whatever. sometimes would like people to take me seriously. haha maybe that was thru council... haha thru council some pple who worked with me realised that they can take me seriously and i can be serious. just thankful that there are pple who recognise me for who i am.
going to crash orientation tmr meeting shawn in sch and melissa too... im gonna bash shawn up if he's late. heh.(OOOPS.... SORRRYYYYY I WAS THE ONE WHO WAS LATE... OVERSLEPT, woke up at 8 when meeting time was 745! sorry sorry bash me up. damn missed the march in) oh well. gonna crash GAY's og.... haha isnt it cool... i used to be his ogl and now he's my ogl.. or i'll copy chitarng and part time as an ogl.. wheee maybe i'll just try to embarass him. haha... yayyyy i finally got a didi... haha always wanted a didi! haha...well yea think he'll be a great ogl... he learnt frm the best! yay. haha jkjk.
truthfully, miss my og. think they were really a great bunch... really cool and all that kinda reminded me of my ac og. haha...odd huh. it was like history repeating itself. and well tt letter from pam just made being an ogl really worthwhile. cept that i didnt have much time for my og... was always missing in action cuz of entertainment comm. haha too many responsibilities and things to do during orientation. dint feel like i was there enough. but well glad i eventually did bond with some pple. MY OG ROCKS!!!! yayyyyyy.. orientation 04 still rocked harder.
but the mafia idea seems super cool too... ALL THE WAY JUNIORS! haha... gonna miss council even more. despite the politics. but they were the pple who made up the majority of my life.
anyway to all the pple who bothered to come even if only for a short while... thank u so so so much... at least u bothered. means alot to me. yups.
and wells... guess my wish didnt come true. didnt really get better.
waiting for my rocket to come take me away. run away from here.
"Close my eyes, let the whole thing pass me by"
She needed someone at 8:10 AM
