Thursday, November 18, 2004
LifEhOuSe-bReAthiNg
I'm finding my way back to sanity again
Though I don't really know what
I'm gonna do when I get there
Take a breath and hold on tight
Spin around one more time
And gracefully fall back to the arms of grace
'Cause I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to
Sit outside Heaven's door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be, yeah...
Where I wanna be...
I am looking past the shadows
In my mind into the truth and
I'm trying to identify
The voices in my head
God, which one is you
Let me feel one more time
What it feels like to feel alive
And break these calluses off of me
One more time
'Cause I am hanging on every word you say
And even if you don't want to speak tonight
That's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more than to sit
Outside your door and listen to you breathing
Is where I want to be, yeah...
I don't want a thing from you
Bet you're tired of me, waiting
For the scraps to fall
Off of your table to the ground
La Da Da La Da Da Da Da Da
'Cause I just want to be here now
'Cause I am hanging on every word you're sayin'
Even if you don't wanna speak tonight,
that's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more
Than to sit outside Heaven's door
And listen to you breathing
It's where I wanna be, yeah...
'Cause I am hanging on every word you're sayin'
Even if you don't wanna speak tonight,
that's alright, alright with me
'Cause I want nothing more
Than to sit outside Heaven's door
And listen to you breathing
It's where I wanna be, yeah...
Where I wanna be...
Where I wanna be...
"maybe u don't realise it but a tiny gesture tt shows that u remembered someone can mean the world. and maybe u're blind to it, but the smallest thing u do can bring someone down from their perch where they think they're so happy."
like this song? haha alternarock rocks... goo goo dolls, dishwalla, lifehouse, oleander, our lady peace, etc. it sounds really jaded... to me. but think it kinda means sth else. i wanna change the song on my blog... should i? maybe change to sth from portishead lifehouse dishwalla. portishead's glorybox is really really nice.. go listen. but it's some weird genre like... newage? it's massive attack-ish.
The whole world's going aussie. i wanna go! haha vin and his frens are going to stay with some guy's relative over in sydney...from 26-3rd i think and stupid guy blew 1.2k on the air ticket and yea i told him abt korea and maybe he'll go yay. aussie...haha it's so beautiful. i've got this funny dream.. i wanna work in california(hopefully san francisco) and live there and everything... then retire... im gonna go aussie to retire. or canada. just now watched this show that showed canada. it's like new zealand! deep blue waters and huge towering mountains and hills and flowers and grass and stuff! suddenly i wanna go canada. but nahh it's impt which uni i end up in so yea. i wont let myself waste away like that. but i'll so go there for like summer holidays or winter holidays or sth. anything not to come back. haha... oh we'll see. i havent been to the place yet i wont know if i'll feel out and wanna come back. but i've wanted this for a long time. a new life, new opportunities. it's going to be beautiful. maybe. will i miss it here? i wont know. but not like it'll make a difference when im gone anyhows i usually dont mean anything to anyone except some crazy shit u can find anywhere. i feel like tearing up autographs. so fake. people forced to say nice things abt u when they dont mean it. but maybe i'll still circulate them so that i can remember the names. mistakes never to make again. whatever. there'll still be pple i will definitely miss. pple who've made a difference in my life by being there for me when i needed it the most. u know who u are. love u.
next week we're all gonna have a new lease on life, finally we can make choices for ourselves. last time the period after Os was the period i felt the most.. free.. as in liberated. no more fake smiles no more pretence.
just found out that not everyone's going in in jan! yayyyy. laogong's going in apr 7 and vin's going in apr too! haha learning driving time. and i can reach the pedal. wonder if mao can thou but she already got her license so maybe she used a brick. heh. oops. but yay... at least i wont be stuck in bitchy-lalaland all the time after all.
econs and chem were well okay. econs.. i dint finish and i was chasing my own tail. dont know if what i wrote was correct but i dint feel very evaluative. merv help!!!! but chose 345... as usual im the market structure lover... and then the other two... i studied that part of macro like siao. so yea. and woo yea worship me im ur master cuz im like that kinda person who wont study sth she doesnt like(math i was forced really bound gagged tied to a math tys), and i hate wages and so i knew i wont choose it so i dint study thou the world banked on it to come out. and guess what? it didnt! woo yea my foul mouth and my telepathy. come on angry mob i'll take u on.
but still not sure if i went outta point for econs so yea im only still hoping and not expecting an a. hoping and praying.
think tagboard is screwed.
yesterday saw waichee and tth kor at the kap bus stop... haha very sweet the two of them... made me think abt the sec2 life... goodness so much drama. well but everyone's come out and changed havent we? i still think he looks like a dead goldfish. but i've told him already. bleh my foul mouth. wanted to like tap the bus window to get their attention but decided to just screw it. dint wanna look like an idiot. waha. havent talked to tth like what for a year? ever since i locked the other cuz the last time i remembered talking to him he was asking for the password. bleh.
yay nxt week gonna get my hair streaked red and my hair will stop falling out frm stress and i'll quit trying to pluck them out. wahaha. and i'll get my ipod and prob my digicam. then maybe i'll go jogging with dilane. but now i've got my ipod i can just run alone without feeling like an idiot. dunno if i should streak my hair red suddenly. but the kind of red im looking for is not the... bright red auntie type. i saw this reddish colour in this mag before. very nice i want that. or daphie's red streaked hair on idol. no merv im not trying to steal ur lover's hair if that's what u're gonna say. and i'll get my dad's old computer frm the uni. haha it's prob gonna be near obsolete but aiya whatever. ive always gotten everything secondhand maybe im not worth sth new. but hey im getting myself new stuff and well it's with my own effort i dont need others to pay for me or anything. yay. i dont like to owe anyone anything. or be dependent on someone. pple betray each other.
my tuition teacher left me with telling me that in uni i have to be consistent and not be like how i got thru jc... do last minute work and pia last minute and get thru by little smarts here and there and weaseling my way outta situations. wahaha. academic situations. she says that last minute work wont get me anywhere. and hardcore studying at the actual last minute wont really get me anywhere either. heh. whoops.
i like yesterday's epi of charmed. it featured a magic sch and the teens in it esp. this one.. the most powerful one who's telepathic and i dunno man he can shapeshift and everything man! yea but well he's this angsty teen who hates the sch for taking it away from his life with the people he loved... his acting was really good. really smooth. his cold blue eyes totally made him look the part of a pained teen. there's this uniqueness abt him. i like the people they feature on charmed. they always seem so magical. haha tv's so my alternate reality.
yay nxt week i'll actually be able to switch the comp on with the music on all the time while mugging for my bio mcq or sth. haha.
jj's coming back sunday. got me a huge softtoy tiger frm some aussie funfair pretty sweet.. haha sneezing here i come. haha i hate my nose... haha the bikiniclad winnie the pooh i brought for yltc had to be wrapped in plastic before i could display it on my shelf. cant wait to see my juniors in ny... haha charmaine and denise.. haha remember last time when i was in ac and went back and they were so... short! and they came and hugged me when they saw me wahha two on one. cuz they're so tiny... like prepubescent and were like one or two heads shorter so they were pretty much hugging me ard my waist like those little toddlers. haha they'll kill me now if i tell them that. but it was soo sweet but they've all grown up now, hormones raging for legolas. remember how last time i would like help one of them with their scarf or belt or badge or sth then i'll go.. there u go charmaine(cuz she's the one in my patrol) and then she'll be like IM DENISE!!!!! in a whiny way. veerrryyy cute and i'll be like eh oh yea hoh. haha twins. im so weird i usually actually like my junior batches more than my batch. all the time. everywhere. but in guides... yea la they backstab so much last time... they could even spread shit and talk mean things abt pple infront of their close frens then. disgusting. maybe when u're not in that batch, u only see the nice things. and maybe i prefer it that way.
miss ny... think the world hates me now. i hate it when people judge me before they even TRY to get to know me.
She needed someone at 1:29 AM
